Learning to Breathe: One Woman's Journey of Spirit and Survival By Alison Wright

Women adventurers fascinate me. Well, to be accurate, adventurers of any gender fascinate me, but women who leap beyond the boundaries of the mundane are of particular interest. Alison Wright is a photojournalist who has spent most of her life traveling all over the world, primarily in Southeast Asia, photographing for magazines. She is also known for her photographic book Faces of Hope: Children of a Changing World. Learning to Breathe, Wright’s most recent book, is about a horrific bus wreck in the tullies of Laos that Wright barely survives, and her multi-year, very difficult recovery. Although the book cover subtitle includes “journey of spirit and survival,” it is a lot less about spirit than survival. Sure the Dali Lama is in there, as is the plight of the Tibetan Buddhists and Richard Gere’s predictable recommendation, but then my sense of the paucity of “spiritual” substance may just be a reflection of my existentialist’s predisposition.

What dominates the book are Wright’s gaud-awful injuries in the bus wreck, and her struggles with medical recovery. The irony is that she barely survives for weeks in remote, medically primitive villages, but doesn't fare much better when she finally makes it back to our "advanced" American medical system. CLICK ON READ MORE BELOW.

Very DEEPak Chopra

Hearing Deepak Chopra speak Monday night at Trinity University made my brain hurt. Or at least the brain I had that night, which according to Dr. Chopra is now gone since we are in a constant state of physically and biologically replacing ourselves, including our brains. Ouch.

I bought the tickets for Deepak Chopra for three reasons:

1.  The event was a fundraiser for the Battered Women’s Shelter of San Antonio, which I like to support;

2.  My daughter JoLene is sort of into “spiritual exploration," and this was a good excuse for us to spend a little adult time together; and

3. I thought I might learn something.

The evening started off nicely as JoLene and I joined Linda Benjamin and her hubby, Butch Miles, Linda’s son from Indiana, Eric Bippen, and Linda's San Antonio friend, Hope Drake, for dinner at Cappy’s on Broadway. Linda is former VP for the Texas Council on Family Violence/National Domestic Violence Hotline, and Butch is a Jazz Studies professor at Texas University and played with The Count Basie Orchestra for 14 years.

(Pictured l-r, JoLene, Butch, Hope, Eric and Linda)

When Linda asked Hope for what type of cuisine Cappy’s was famous and she said “seafood.” I silently gasped, leaned to my daughter and whispered “Anthony Bourdain said in his book Kitchen Confidential to never order seafood on a Monday because fish aren’t delivered on Sunday or Monday, so the fish aren't fresh.” JoLene ordered a petit fillet of beef, I ordered lamb, everyone else ordered seafood, and no one died of ptomaine!

When Dr. Chopra stepped from behind the curtain (I cannot tell you how ashamed I am to admit this), all I could think was, oh my gaud, he has a potbelly! How could someone that is such an icon of “wellness” have a potbelly? Then he began talking about his medical background and how that led him to a quest for deeper answers to, as Guy Noir from Prairie Home Companion would say, “life’s perplexing questions.”

Chopra believes, as do I, that by ridding oneself of negative emotions and listening to signals from the body, health can be improved. He also has an enormous following and has written 65 books. The man is obviously an intellectual, but honestly I’m more of a Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens kind of gal - we’re born; we live as well as possible; our body gives out; we die.  If that sounds empty, I’m sorry, but my life is full, full, full, and if this is all there is, OK by me!

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve faced horrific issues, but as a therapist told me one time, your black hole of despair doesn’t help your children. Give them the gift of showing them how to rise like a phoenix from the ashes, and live a happy, healthy, full life. Click on Read More Below...

Smart Gals Sip – Libby, Nicole and Rebecca

(Pictured l-r, Libby Einhorn and Nicole Davenport)

My niece Nicole invited me and my hubby to have birthday brunch with her and her best friend, Libby Einhorn, at the Four Seasons Sunday and it was really nice, but probably not worth the $350 it cost for the four of us. Getting dressed up and mingling with the upper crust was sort of cool, and the panna cotta, eggs benedict and prime rib were delish, but the shrimp was mushy and had obviously been frozen. Bottom line, the company and setting were the best parts.

Libby is a super cool Petroleum Engineer for Eagle Rock, a small, local oil company in Midland, Texas. She also volunteers at the YWCA four nights a week teaching Aerobics, Spinning and Kickboxing.  I can totally picture Libby bossing West Texas redneck roughnecks around out on a rig location. We’ve come a long way, baby! She was lots of fun and what is funny is that although Libby’s been to Austin four times, this is the first time she’s ever really stayed in Austin. She explained that she always flies into Austin to go to Lake Austin Spa, catching the shuttle at the airport, going straight out to the spa, and reversing the process to go home. I never cease to be amazed at how many Very Smart Gals there are out there!

My niece by marriage/divorce, Nicole Davenport is my x-sister-in-law Freida Kay Noelke Davenport's daughter (see her profile under “My Friends”). Nicole worked for years in television production in NYC, but decided about 5 years ago that being a chef was her true calling, and has spend the past few years sweating in a kitchen and loving it. Her most recent claim to fame is an appearance on TLC’s B-B-Q Pit Masters, a TV reality show that pits BBQ cooks against each other.  I’ll never forget Nicole’s line in the show (sitting in her Marathon "White Buffalo Bar "cowgirl shirt and big-brimmed cowgirl hat), “I didn’t come all the way from Texas to get my ass kicked by a bunch of hippies.” When I told her I thought that was hilarious, she said, “Oh, that was in the script. They told me to say that.” So much for “reality” TV!

Monday night she and Rebecca Rather (pictured), of Rather Sweet Bakery and cookbook fame, came over for happy hour and dinner, and ended up spending the night. Can you believe I had the cajones to feed two chefs?  Rebecca began her career as a private caterer in Houston, before moving on to become pastry chef for Houston restaurateur Tony Vallone and his group of restaurants. After apprenticing with Daniel Leader, she worked as executive pastry chef for research and development for Schlotzsky's Bread Alone cafés. In 1999, she started her own business, Rather Sweet Bakery, in Austin. In 2001, she moved the bakery to Fredericksburg. She has been featured in Texas Monthly, Gourmet, Ladies' Home Journal, Food & Wine, Southern Living, Chocolatier, and Saveur, where she was among Saveur's 100 favorites for 2003.

 

Rebecca and Nicole are cooking up a new restaurant in Fredericksburg and want to throw a party for the Very Smart Gals, so you may be getting an invite soon!  Wouldn't it be fun for all the Very Smart Gals to finally meet!

We insisted that Rebecca try out my outdoor shower, so I snapped this photo (right). I may put up a sign that says “Rebecca Rather Bathed Here. “ We had fun talking about horses and food and men and food and men.

Alas Babylon By Pat Frank

Written in 1959 by Pat Frank, Alas Babylon is a “classic” post-apocalyptic tale set in Florida that came highly recommended by Audible.com and Amazon.com and received “5 stars” by 46% of reader ratings. So, I read the whole damn thing trying to find something good about it.  I never did.

It is sexist, racist and boring. Oh yes, and required reading in most American high school literature classes, which is truly depressing. When Pat Frank wrote at the end of the book that the surviving women would need strong men to lead them I sort of threw up in my mouth.

The End.

Smart Gals Sip – Nan, Marci, Shannon and Tosca

Pictured, l-r, Nan McRaven, Marci Roberts, Shannon Sedwick and Tosca Gruber.

Who has happy hour on a Tuesday? Anyone who wants to have a happy hour with Shannon Sedwick, that’s who. Just about any other night of the week Shannon’s channeling Patsy Cline singing, “I’ve got these little things, she’s got you,” and pulling a saw out the top of her strapless formal. If you haven’t been to Esther’s Follies on 6th Street, you have no idea what I’m talking about, and cannot officially consider yourself an Austinite. Shannon and her hubby have been producing Esther’s Follies, a fabulous satirical musical comedy revue, since 1977. We always take Austin visitors to Esther’s Follies, and you should too, but be aware that the show is packed every performance, so purchasing tickets in advance is imperative.  Shannon is also famous for Patsy's Cafe on East Ben White (Hwy 71). The food is fab, they have great entertainment and, if you’re lucky, you might even run into Shannon. My favorite memory of Shannon is at the Capital in 1989 for the presentation of Austin Women – 150 Years of Trial and Triumph, a freestanding exhibit of photographs and captions of Austin women's history, presented to the City of Austin as a 150-birthday gift. I was the chair of that project; Ruthe Weingarten and Janet Humphrey wrote the history; and Shannon and her troupe performed vignettes. 

I’ve known Nan McRaven since 1983 when I went to work for County Commissioner Bob Honts and Nan was the Travis County Personnel and Budget Director. Ann Richards was a County Commissioner, as was Richard Moya (those were crazy days!). Nan went on to become a congressional staff member, a vice president for communications and public affairs for a number of high-tech firms (including Motorola), and has more recently become a business development consultant at Strategic Partners, Inc. working with Mary Scott Nabers. When Nan charged into Jeffrey’s Tuesday night, she was so excited I thought she was going to explode! She’d just bought an Armani suit to wear to a very special event honoring her brother, William McRaven, Nan’s Navy SEAL “Rambo,” UT grad brother, and the mastermind behind the discovery and killing of Osama Bin Laden! Shut Up! Seriously! I told Nan that I was going to buy her a bumper sticker that says, “My brother kicked Osama Bin Laden’s Ass.” I never do one of the Very Smart Gals get togethers that doesn’t produce something magnificent.

On Monday I got a text from my niece by marriage/divorce, Nicole, saying that she and Rebecca Rather (of Rather Sweet Bakery fame) would be in Austin Thursday to work with my hubby on a logo for their new Fredericksburg restaurant Sugar and Smoke. I said she should come in early and go to the Tuesday happy hour. She replied that she couldn’t, but that I should invite their restaurant architect, Marci Roberts, who was in town from Marathon. Turns out, Marci is fiancé  to famous Marathon photographer James Evans. I’ve been an Evans fan for years and often go by his studio in Marathon to say hello and buy his fabulous photography books to give as wedding gifts. Marci, owner of meo design, moved to Marathon after working for 14 years in New York City, Barcelona, Connecticut and Austin where she worked for Graber, Simmons and Cowen (GCS Architects). AND, she owns my favorite grocery store of all times, and an icon of fabulous Marathon, 111-year-old The French Grocer (which by the way is for sale if you’re looking for an interesting second-life). Marci is cool, gorgeous, and an incredibly talented architect and designer. I made a new Very Smart Gal-friend!

Last, but far from least, is Tosca Gruber, who once and for all cleared up my misconception that you can’t look like Barbie and also be a uber-smart business woman! I met Tosca in the 1990’s when I was the Director of Development for The Center For Child Protection, and her then husband, famous 1992 World Series-winning Toronto Blue Jay baseball player, Kelly Gruber, was playing in a celebrity/charity golf tournament. I remember thinking how cool it would be to meet Kelly, but then I met his wife, Tosca, and realized rather quickly that she was waayyyyy cooler. Tosca is a Coldwell Banker realtor with what looks like the alphabet after her name - ABR, GRI, CRS, CNMS, CNRS – which I believe spell “Very $uccessful.” And she owns several businesses in town, including a famous music club, which she just bought from a famous local singer (all hush hush at this point so I can’t name names), Steiner Ranch Steakhouse and Walton Florist and Nursery. But, the thing that impresses me the most about Tosca is that she is all of the above, AND the mother of four children, including a college-age son, a special needs daughter, and a freshman and junior playing football at Westlake High School. The day after our Jeffrey’s happy hour Tosca sent us all an email saying, “I want to reciprocate with an evening of fun at Steiner Steak House on me, with a driver, or a tailgate party at UT Golf Course on Friday the 14th before our home Oklahoma game. Thank you to SueAnn for including me! I so needed a night of Crazy. Please know you all can call me for anything, even non-related real estate stuff. I have done many things, but being a friend I love most.”

What a great bunch of Very Smart Gals!

One Hundred Things My Mother Taught Me a Million Times - Chapter #76

#76 - "Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, chin up."

Just to give you some idea of how engrained in my psyche #76 is, I caught myself pulling my shoulders back, and pushing my boobs and chin out at 5:30 this morning as I stumbled back toward my bed to wait for the coffee to brew. I literally stopped myself halfway down the hall, my inner voice asking, “What the hell are you doing, SueAnn?”

At 5 feet 2 inches, mom was all about being as tall as possible which included exceptional posture, and she was determined to make me stand tall too. I suspect that she sent me to twirling camp when I was a teen because she knew they would beat exaggerated posture into me, and they did! Anyone out there that was a twirler in high school or college knows exactly what I’m talking about.

I also suspect that mom knew that a posture of shoulders out and chin up would give me a look of confidence, an invaluable quality. At a recent party, I saw one of my granddaughters standing slumped shouldered so I rushed over to pull her shoulders back and to lift her chin. “Stand up straight,” I said, feeling eerily like my mother. I suspect she was feeling a little self-conscious about her low-cut dress and was trying to hide her budding breasts. I remember being her age and trying desperately to sink what to me felt like horrifyingly gigantic basketballs sitting on my chest. I felt like a freak and that everyone was staring at me. However, after three or four twirling lessons, and a few admiring boys, I was sticking them out there so far it’s a wonder they didn’t trip someone.

When I was pregnant with my children, my posture nearly went to hell as I tended to slump everything onto the beach ball on my stomach. Then post pregnancy, I began to pull it all up again, trying unsuccessfully to disappear my persistent baby-belly. Now that I’m 60-something, I’ve convinced myself that if I don’t maintain my posture, I’ll start looking like one of those (gaud forbid) slumped over old people, and get one of those humps behind my neck, then comes the walker! Eeewwwwhhhh!

So mom was right! Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, chin up.

Inside Scientology: The Story of America's Most Secretive Religion by Janet Reitman

About every 50 pages of the 400-page Inside Scientology, I found myself thinking, “Has Tom Cruise lost his freaking mind?” You could write on the back of a matchbook what I knew about Scientology before I read this book, so I didn’t go into it with the burden of prejudice but I sure as hell came out of it with one. Can you say CULT?  

 

Most religions have an element of crazy and cult (i.e., zealotry, exclusivity, the inevitable whacko splinter groups) so I’m not prejudiced against Scientology as much as I’m prejudiced against extremism. With the founder, L. Ron Hubbard’s very weird history (pictured), the code language, military-like uniforms worn by the officers of the organization, extreme secrecy and sketchy methodologies, Scientology takes the cuckoo cake.  

I don’t know if L. Ron was pissed because his therapist told him something he didn’t like or what, but the man had (he's dead) a serious hard-on against psychiatry and that seems to be the basis for Scientology, which is pretty ridiculous. Hubbard goes really sci-fi saying that we are all reincarnated and have lived on other planets. These are secrets revealed only to church members willing to pay for them, and gal howdy do they! The Church of Scientology charges the hound dog out of their members for just about every service provided, and coerces their members relentlessly to recruit other paying members, milking them for every penny they can and, as a result, the Church is mega-rich with incredible real estate holdings.

Pretty by Jillian Lauren

As I lie here in a Best Western motel in Sonora Texas with the faux luxury bedspread of polyester chaffing my arms, I feel emotional and vulnerable and incredibly fortunate. I don’t know if these high-pitched feelings are because I just read on Facebook that a friend loves my youngest son too (a son that needs lots of love) or if it is because Jillian Lauren just slayed the shit out of me with her book Pretty, but tears are pouring down my face and it’s all good.

Shortly after receiving Pretty from the Penguin Group (they occasionally send me free books), I received an email from Milena Brown, Associate Publicist at Penguin, asking if I planned on reviewing the book and letting me know that Pretty author Jillian Lauren would be at the October Texas Book Festival. I emailed her back saying that I knew I was loving Pretty because I kept looking at the photo of author Jillian Lauren in the back of the book, as if there were a code hidden in the contours of her face .

Pretty is the story of Bebe, a 20-something wreck of a girl who survives a drug-fueled car wreck that kills her looser, yet pretty jazz musician boyfriend, Aaron. She is cleverly described on the book’s cover as an ex-everything: Ex-stripper, ex-Christian, ex-drug addict, ex-pretty girl, so I was primed right off the bat to dislike her. And I was pretty successful at disliking her for about the first 100 pages, but Bebe (or should I say Jillian Lauren with her relentless humanity) wore me down. Dang, I hate it when people burst my superiority illusion.

Smart Gals Sip

Mary Nell Mathis, Becky Beaver, Karen Sonleitner, Emma Lou Linn and Cecelia Burke (pictured) - what a powerhouse group of women! We convened at Jeffrey’s on a Tuesday night for some fun reminiscing and, sure enough, the magic showed up right on cue.

I met Mary Nell Mathis around 1989 when I was President of the Austin Women’s Political Caucus. She came to a meeting and introduced herself saying that she ran for US Congress out of Lubbock. Any woman with that much spunk simply had to be my friend! Mary Nell graduated from Mary Baldwin College in Virginia, taught mathematics at Texas Tech, and has been a fierce government watchdog as the Chair of Common Cause, nipping at the heels of governors through numerous administrations.  When I asked Mary Nell about her 15 minutes of fame, she said she thought it was probably her 2007 live interview on CNBC. When I invited Becky Beaver to join the group for drinks, I had no idea that she had known Mary Nell even longer then I, so that made our little reunion even sweeter. I’ve known Becky so long that neither of us are sure when or how we met, but we decided it had to have been through the Austin Women’s Political Caucus, probably in the early 80’s. Becky graduated from Tech and then UT Law School, and has since become a preeminent Central Texas Family Law attorney and a well-know community philanthropist, serving on many local boards.  Just Google her and you’ll see what I mean! Karen Sonleitner and I bonded when she was a Television News Reporter for KVUE and I was working as Sr. Aide to County Commissioner Bob Honts. Karen went on to serve as the Travis County Commissioner for Precinct 2 for eleven years. Karen said that her 15 minutes of fame was probably in 1995 when she was one of the very few democrats elected to office during a very atypical Austin Republican landslide year! Karen is a smart gal who is not afraid to stand up for what she believes in, and she accomplished so much during her terms as County Commissioner. Emma Lou Linn cracks me up. If I had to be stuck on a deserted island with one person, I could do a lot worse then Emma Lou!  I met Emma when she was elected to the Austin City Council in 1975, along with a historic group of mold-breakers. She has a PhD in Psychology from UT, is currently Professor of Psychology and Forensic Science at St. Edwards University, and serves on the Forensics Board of the Texas Criminal Defense Investigators Alliance. And get this: She’s from Rocksprings! Another small-town gal makes it big. She regaled us with a funny story about being in Europe during the 70’s and being repeatedly mistaken for Barbara Bel Geddes who played the character of the “Grand Dame” Miss Ellie in the hit TV show Dallas. She milked the misidentification and enjoyed celebrity status all over Europe! Cecelia Burke was Travis County Tax Assessor Collector for six years between 1993 and 1999, when she became the Travis County Director of Domestic Relations. She also worked under Lieutenant Governor Bob Bullock when he was State Comptroller.  Cecelia recently retired and when I asked her what she was doing now, she said, “I’m working out. I walk. I go to the gym.  And I do Pilates.” So needless to say, she’s is great shape! She told some really funny stories about the Women’s Political Caucus, getting in and out of scrapes! This doesn’t even come close to telling you how important these women have been, and are, to Austin and Texas politics and women’s election to Austin offices. They all significantly influenced my political involvement, and they all “threw their bodies over the barbed wire” for Ann Richards as she approached her election to Texas Governor. A great bunch of smart gals with whom I feel fortunate to be associated.

The Intentional Networker by Patti DeNucci

The Intentional Networker by Patti DeNucci (pictured) is a power-packed “how to” for young ambitious professionals seeking to build a career; or middle-aged professionals who can’t seem to reach the professional peak; or old, semi-retired professionals who need to be reminded that they don’t know it all.

Discloser: the author of The Intentional Networker, Patti DeNucci, is a long-time acquaintance, and our friendship is one that defies time and distance. We bonded over a mutual love of reading and something else indefinable, and I know that even if I never see her again, she will always be my friend. 

I was in awe of and genuinely excited for Patti when I first heard that she was publishing a book, but then I blurted out that I wanted to read it and review it on my blog, and trepidation settled in my gut. What if the book was boring, pedantic, fluffy, or anything less than fab? Thankfully, it was none of those things, well, except fab.

When I started The Intentional Networker I found myself making a list of people to whom I needed to give this book. Among my copious notes in the margins were, “give a copy to the kids,” and “this book should be required reading for high school kids,” but by page 45, I had forgotten about helping others, and started thinking how this book could help me, i.e., when Patti suggest the reader list their “big three” life priorities, I listed, 1. Family; 2. Exercising my mind; and 3. Being still. Realizing that I valued "being still" was an important revelation to me.

The Intentional Networker is really about how to attract more business, particularly through what Patti coins, “intentional networking,” but since getting more business is a lot about being a person of good character, it provides a smorgasbord of thought-provoking and valuable takeaways, regardless of whether you are an ambitious business-climber or a lounge-lizard.

The Talented Mr. Ripley by Patricia Highsmith

I really wish I’d read Patricia Highsmith’s book The Talented Mr. Ripley before I saw director, Anthony Mingella’s 1999 movie adaptation by the same name, because the entire time I was reading the book I kept envisioning, Matt Damon as Tom Ripley, Jude Law as Dickie Greenleaf, Phillip Seymour Hoffman as Freddie Miles and Gwyneth Paltrow as Marge Sherwood. Oops, now you will too.

It never occurred to me that The Talented Mr. Ripley was a book before it became a screenplay, but when I recently did a search for “best thriller books ever,” it popped up on every list, along with The Killer Inside Me, which I previously read and reviewed. So I went into the book knowing who does what, and thinking that would diminish my enjoyment. It didn’t. First, I want to tell you a little about the author, Patricia Highsmith (pictured), mostly because I so loved her writing style, which was smooth, intelligent, and so subtly terrifying (Graham Greene called Highsmith "the poet of apprehension"), but also because she’s a Texas gal, born in Fort Worth, and a pretty interesting character herself.  

Highsmith grew up in Texas and New York, but spent most of her adult life in England and France. During her life, Highsmith was a popular author in Europe, however, her books went in and out of print for decades in the US. Her first novel, Strangers on a Train did gain Highsmith considerable fame after Alfred Hitchcock made it into a film. And then there’s  Danny DeVito's Hitchcock spoof Throw Momma From the Train. Also of interest is that many of Highsmith’s books, including The Talented Mr. Ripley, have very, very, subtle homosexual undertones. In Ripley it was an intriguing part of the mystery. Was he? Or wasn’t he?

One Hundred Things My Mother Taught Me a Million Times - Chapter 75

(Passport photo, 1957. We spent 3 months in Europe)

#75 - Always behave nicely with boys or they will never marry you.

Apparently I’ve behaved too nicely with boys my entire life because I’ve been married so many times I can barely keep track! Honestly, I wish mom had said, “You really need to be a little slutttier SueAnn, otherwise you’ll end up in a series of heartbreaking marriages.” 

Bottom line, I came out of my first marriage with three wonderful children and a broken heart, my second and third with some fabulous (and not so fabulous) memories and lessons learned, and my fourth and last, a great friend and companion. A couple of years ago my daughter told me I was being mean to my husband, so I decided to be nicer to him. But that worries me a little because looking back on my history, being nice hasn’t really served me that well.

But let’s go back to puberty when this whole issue of being a nice girl first became an issue. I was a nice girl, or at least I think I was. Of course after I made out in the backseat of Mr. and Mrs. A’s car with their son all the way back from church camp (it was dark), they probably didn’t think so.  But I didn’t go “all the way” with anyone until I was married, which seemed the criteria for “nice girl” when I was growing up.  I thought I knew in high school who “did it” and who didn’t, but really I didn’t (know).  I remember finding out about a pregnant girl a couple years younger then me and thinking, “Not her! She doesn’t even bleach her hair!” It would be an understatement to say that I was naive.

State of Wonder by Ann Patchett

I glided through Ann Patchett’s new book State of Wonder in my own state of wonder with her marvelous writing, the titillating theme, and my faith that this was going to be a tour de force to rival one of her best books yet, Bel Canto! But at some point, or several actually, I began to wonder if it was really as wonderful as I'd hoped.

Dr. Marina Singh is a demure employee of a pharmaceutical company and, of course we all know that demure women are good and pharmaceutical companies are soulless moneygrubbers. But I shook off my premonitions and clung to Patchett like a nursing baby.

Singh is demurely having an affair with the CEO of the company, who she religiously calls “Mr. Fox,” even after they’ve swapped body juice. She is not, however, having an affair with her co-worker, Anders Eckman, despite Anders’ wife’s suspicions - strange, but not strange enough to derail my wondrous journey with Patchett.

Anders Eckman (Singh’s co-worker), having gone to the Amazon to check on a project, dies while down there, so Mr. Fox sends Singh to the Amazon to find out what the hell is going on. But the project leader, Annick Swenson (the star of the book in my book), is too busy to be bothered by Eckman’s death, the pharmaceutical company or Marina Singh, and so the mystery builds!

A Stolen Life: A Memoir by Jaycee Dugard

In 1991, Phillip and Nancy Garrido kidnapped Jaycee Dugard, age eleven, as she walked to her schools bus, just steps away from her home in South Lake Tahoe California. Eighteen years later, she, along with her eleven and fifteen-year-old daughters were discovered and returned to freedom. As I read this statement I feel a deep black hole widening in my chest. Although I now know much of the horrifying detail of Jaycee Dugard's hours, days, weeks, months, years of torture, rape, and captivity at the hands of the Garridos, as told in her recent book, A Stolen Life: A Memoir, I have a hard time understanding that humans are capable of such beastly, soulless behavior.

Dugard lived in a tent in the Garrido’s back yard, and gave birth to her two daughters there. Garrido’s wife Nancy would go to playgrounds and film little girls doing the splits and showing their panties to take back to her husband. Garrido told Dugard that by being there for him to rape, literally for days on end (he called them “runs”), she was saving some other little girl. The depravity of the situation is unimaginable.

The book was amazingly digestible considering the topic, and there were some interesting elements that came out in her story. One was her obsession with cats – the only good thing in her life. They didn’t hurt her, lie or expect anything from her. They were all she had until she gave birth to her daughters, who she was forced to treat as her sisters.

Also of interest, Jaycee didn’t feel that she could or should escape because who would take her back or love her after what she’d been through. Her captors would abuse her horribly. then tell her they loved her and bring her gifts. They became her world; the Stockholm syndrome, where the captive grows to love their captor, tragically played out.

Smart Gals Sip

Jeffrey’s was cool and dark, a welcome relief as I’d just walked through a wall of heat between my car and the bar. Although I never drink hard liquor, on a whim I ordered a “Friendly Ghost,” gin, coconut water, lime and cucumber, and tried not to gulp it down. Francie Ferguson was the first to arrive, face lit up as usual, and viewing my cool concoction, she ordered the Ghost too!

I met Francie when she was the Executive Director of Foundation Communities and I was president of the board. Francie actually founded Foundation Communities, but at the time it was call the Central Texas Mutual Housing Association. We bought distressed properties (apartment complexes, duplexes, etc), fixed them up, housed low-income families, and provided onsite services, i.e., tutoring, tax preparation, counseling, job skills training, etc. Of course all the board did was show up and vote, lend credibility, advise and occasionally raise a little money. Francie was the brain behind it all and I’ve vowed to never let her out of my circle of friends. Francie has served as the Director of the NeighborWorks® Multifamily Initiative for NeighborWorks America since 1998, and holds her masters in business (concentration in real estate and finance) from the University of Texas at Austin, and her bachelor's degree from Oberlin College.

While Francie and I caught up we grazed on an eclectic selection of cheeses, figs and melons, Steak Tartare, Quail Leg Confit, and Pommes Frites. Sounds like a lot, but you know how it is, your pay $60 for plates of food that wouldn’t satisfy a small child (quality not quantity, my new mantra).

Melinda Rodriguez swept in next, obviously still buzzing from her board meeting with the Catholic Charities of Central Texas, for which Melinda serves as the Executive Director. Melinda has lost 85 pounds over the past year so I almost didn’t recognize her. She looks great! I met Melinda when she was the Director of Development at El Buen Samaritano, a wonderful organization in south-central Austin that provides services to primarily low-income Hispanic families. Melinda has since moved on to Catholic Charities, which provides a variety of human services in a 25 county area of Central Texas, and the woman is busier then a cranberry merchant on Thanksgiving!  A native of Brownsville, Melinda has a master’s degree in Human Services from St. Edward’s University, a bachelor’s degree in Communications from the University of Texas, and is incredibly focused and bright, the criteria for membership in the Very Smart Gals! When I urged Melinda to have some of the snacks, she said she’d nibbled all during her board meeting and wasn’t hungry. I said, pizza? And she said, no, turkey out of the sandwiches! She also drank water. I tell you the woman is focused!

Last to arrive was Andrea Torres, and when I hugged her, she was so hot from being outside in the horrible heat; I thought I was going to spontaneously combust! I was on my second Ghost and was seriously flammable! Andrea is the Director of Development at Meals on Wheels and More, and I met her when I was writing grants for their capital campaign. There’s really something special about walking into a new building serving hungry elderly and homebound people, knowing that you helped make it possible. Andrea graduated from Stanford University, a school I've always wanted to attend, and may yet! She’s super smart, cool as a cucumber and fun too! Especially after she’s had a gin and tonic!

Before long, we were all baring our souls, commiserating, talking about everything and nothing – which is my second favorite thing about these get togethers. My favorite being the Very Smart Gals, with whom I feel fortunate to share oxygen! Thanks for a fun happy hour, Francie, Melinda and Andrea!

One Hundred Things My Mother Taught Me a Million Times - Chapter 74

#74 - A sweet potato makes a beautiful, inexpensive, fast growing houseplant.
(Photo is of mom upon her college graduation - she was 40-years-old and had five kids when she graduated)
I love sweet potatoes and would probably eat them three times a week if the hubby shared that affection. Pan roasted with a little olive oil and a sprinkling of chopped rosemary, yum! I buy them often with the best of intentions, but in reality only cook them occasionally. Those that don’t get cooked sit in my veggie basket patiently waiting to please me, slowly loosing their moisture, their skin shriveling in seeming despair. I glance at them briefly, guiltily, like I’ve somehow let them down by not relishing their sweet, creamy being, and eventually toss them, all the while looking over my shoulder not making potato-eye contact. But, every now and then, I catch a glimpse of a root, reaching out, like a begging hand, and somehow know that this is one sweet potato I cannot get rid of because it reminds me of my mom.

Mom had a particular fondness for simple plants. I cannot pass by a stand of morning glories without tearing up, and I cannot throw away a sweet potato that has sprouted a root, because those were my mom’s two favorite plants. Morning glories grew prolifically out by mom’s back door, their purple and blue flowers trumpeting their vibrant beauty only briefly and yet gloriously in the cool of the morning.

Her sweet potato plants brought a deep green jungle of trailing vines and giant leaves into our home, adding a living breathing feeling to the otherwise inanimate furnishings. She would show me an aging sweet potato, pointing out the tiny roots reaching out of their eyes and say, “We’ll put this one in a jar.”

Emily and Einstein by Linda Francis Lee

I struggled to come up with an honest description of Emily and Einstein by Linda Francis Lee because I sort of liked it, but was also sort of mad at it because it didn’t pan out to be everything I wanted it to be (although I would also struggle to tell you why). So here you go. It was a sweet little book.

Emily is a too nice gal from modest origins married to Sandy, a despicable guy from old money. A cliché. Sandy steps off the curb in New York City where they live, gets hit by a bus, dies and comes back as an injured dog that is sent to a pound where he is nursed back to health and eventually adopted by a volunteer at the pound, his wife, Emily. Not a cliché, although it seems everyone is writing dog books. Who doesn’t have a special place in their heart for unconditionally loving canines? The theme of a husband dying and coming back as a dog, Einstein, was titillating, but Sandy/Einstein was such a terrible person and dog, I eventually found myself wanting him to run out into the street again.

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, and Sandy/Einstein’s “e-ville” mom hardly waits for the dirt to settle on her son’s grave before she begins eviction proceedings to get her daughter-in-law thrown out of her son’s apartment at the famous Dakota building. OMG, I can’t tell you how any times I’ve stood outside the Dakota and imagined myself living there, in an apartment overlooking Central Park of course.

Sandy has come back as a dog because, in some weird supernatural situation I could never seem to understand, he must make amends to Emily for being such a shit before he can go to heaven or wherever. That whole theme is never explained to my satisfaction, or perhaps I zoned out when author, Lee (photo below), explained.

My Editor – Deborah Fondren

I would like to take a few lines to thank my editor and best friend, Deborah Fondren, who gamely puts up with my weekly, and sometimes painful attempts at grammar and punctuation. Believe me when I say that any slaughter of the Kings English in my blogging is probably due to my diddling with Deb’s edits.

 Thanks to Susan Eason too for stepping in as a substitute editor when Deb is busy, away from her computer, or justifiably ignoring me!

Photo was taken in San Miguel Mexico in 2007, and is my favorite photo of us because it is flattering to us both! We have been such good friends for so long that a few people have accused us of being lesbian lovers, which if we weren't such devoted heterosexuals, could actually be true (gag reflex engaged). I love her (platonically) that much.

Area 51: An Uncensored History of America's Top Secret Military Base by Annie Jacobsen

What is more disturbing than aliens in Roswell? The “big reveal” at the end of Annie Jacobsen’s book, Area 51: An Uncensored History of America's Top Secret Military Base!

Let me preface my review of Area 51 by saying that I am not a conspiracy theorists, I do not believe aliens from another planet have landed in Roswell, New Mexico (or anywhere else on Earth), and I am not particularly enthralled with government cover-ups. I am, however, very curious about just about everything, which is what led me to read Area 51.

Ever wonder why you can’t seem to get your teeth as white as the “whitening strips” promise?  Ever wonder why your third cousin removed says, “like” a lot? According to author Annie Jacobsen, your permanently yellow teeth and your cousin’s annoying linguistics are both because of Area 51. Not really, but by the time I finished reading Area 51, it seemed as though there were less then seven degrees of separation between every event and circumstance in the world, and Area 51.

Three Cups of Deceit: How Greg Mortenson, Humanitarian Hero, Lost His Way by Jon Krakauer

Nobody likes a tattletale. On the other hand, even depressing circumspection is good.

Jon Krakauer, whose books Into Thin Air and Into The Wild I loved, has stirred up a hornet’s nest, al la Oprah Winfrey/James Frey (A Thousand Little Pieces). In Three Cups of Deceit, he provides details and “evidence” that Greg Mortenson’s book, Three Cups of Tea, is full of lies and exaggerations, and that Mortenson has exploited the non-profit he establish, Central Asia Institute and its donors, for his own personal gain.

Three Cups of Tea is Mortenson’s huge best seller about how when lost in Afghanistan after trying unsuccessfully to climb K2 (second highest peak in the Himalayas), he ends up in a village where he is taken in and cared for. In appreciation, he pledges to return and build schools all over Afghanistan, which he does, via the non-profit he establishes, Central Asia Institute.

Three Cups of Deceit is Jon Krakauer’s claim that Three Cups of Tea is 90% false, Central Asia Institute is poorly run, and Mortenson is a deceitful opportunist.

Summer Fun With The Grandkids!