One Hundred Things My Mother Taught Me A Million Times – Chapter 79

#79 – “Always wipe around plates to get the food dribbles off before you serve.”

(Making holiday ornaments with some of the grandkids!)

As you’ve heard me say many times, Mom was an enigma. She was a recluse and an extrovert; quiet and chatty; obsessed with her looks and a dedicated slob. And, as the saying goes, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Let’s just say we’re eclectic. 

So what does this have to do with dribbles on plates? Well, mom would take a cake to a church social covered in a discarded plastic potato bag then (minus the bag) insist that the cake be carved into perfectly uniform pieces and served without a stray crumb on the plate. She would also boil borderline rancid meat in salt water to “purify” it and then prepare and serve it on china with the good silver. She was into food presentation before I ever even saw the word presentation used in proximity to food.

In these days of micro-portions and zero-fat dishes, I guess dribbles are a thing of the past, but when I was growing up it was all about creamy, drippy food and filling the plate to the rim. What is interesting is that although my generation was raised on lots of meat, potatoes, gravy, whole milk, sugar, real butter, eggs, and bread, and very few fresh vegetables, our parents weren’t obese and didn’t seem to die off prematurely. Furthermore, most everyone I grew up with is still alive and in reasonably good condition! In fact our lifespan has continued almost to the point of being ridiculous. After watching my mother turn into a zombie in a nursing home with 200 other zombies, I just do not want to live that long. Unfortunately, longevity is in my genes.

But back to wiping around plates to get the dribbles off--I still make gravy in our house, and beans, and stew, and soup, so dribbles happen, but I always wipe around the plate or bowl, just like mom taught me. After all, eclectic and cultured are not antonyms, and I do want to carry on the heritage of consistent inconsistency! 

The Gap Year by Sarah Bird

As I read Austinite Sarah Bird’s most recent novel The Gap Year, I  felt such a strong connection to her writing style and humor, and the setting, theme and characters of the book, I couldn’t help but wonder if she and I are twins separated at birth.  The two main characters of The Gap Year are Camille (Cam) Lightsey and her daughter Aubrey. Cam is a single mom who has given up on men, but has never gotten over her one true love, ex-husband Martin, the bohemian philosopher she fell in love with on a European backpacking trip. Unfortunately, Martin eventually became more interested in seeking his ultimate “being” then the “being” he sprouted in Cam's uterus, so he deserted her and the babe to hide in a cult for 16 years.

Cam raises Aubrey alone struggling to get her into the best schools, the cutest clothes and with the right kids. Absurdly, she’s also a hippy snob who thinks that people who send their kids to the best schools, dress them in designer labels and push them into cheerleading and football are poseurs. Cam is a Lactation Consultant living in a part of town where the word ‘lactation’ is never uttered, but she longs to live where dreadlocked, Birkenstocked, patchouli-reeking women gather in pocket parks, openly breast-feed their four-year olds, and share their hopes for world peace.

Surprise, surprise! Cam raises a daughter who is a conflicted rebel, which terrifies Cam because she sees herself in her daughter. Teen Aubrey is clueless about what she believes, but certain about what she doesn’t believe: anything that her mom does. She despises the popular-kid clicks and then falls in love with the captain of the football team. She resents her abandoning dad but lets him in her life via Facebook. The classic life-and-family struggles ensue and we see ourselves and find comfort in knowing that we’re not alone in the universe of family craziness. Click On Read More Below...

The Vanishing Act of Esme Lennox by Maggie O'Farrell

Iris, a young Scottish woman, is living a somewhat compromised and colorless life in Edinburgh, running a dress shop and in a relationship with a married man, when she receives news that she must now care for great-aunt Esme Lennox who has been hospitalized in a psychiatric hospital for 61 years – an aunt she didn’t even know existed! Now that’s a storyline that can make you snuggle down into a soft blanket and not want to surface until the mystery unravels!  Toss in a couple of other family twists, and you’ve got a page-turner.

Why was Esme committed to a mental institution when she was 16? Why is Iris just now finding out that her Alzheimer-afflicted (and pathologically cranky) grandmother, Kitty Lockhart, has a sister? What is Iris to do with Esme? What will Esme have to say about her life? What will happen when Esme and Kitty are reunited?

In the process of uncovering Esme’s story, Iris discovers much more than she could have imagined, and a heritage that brings new perspective to her life. The Vanishing Act of Esme Lennox reminded me of that Bible verse that goes something along the lines of, “The sins of the parents are visited upon the children.” 

In spite of the titillating storyline, I’m glad that I listened to this book rather than read it. I saw many reviews in which readers complained that the back-and-forth timeframe made the story difficult to follow and that the writing was not great. O'Farrell (pictured) is the author of a number of recognizable books, including, After You'd Gone," and The Hand That First Held Mine.

Although this book won’t make my list of “2011 Best Books” (stay tuned), it also won’t make the “worst of” list either. It was well worth the time.  Oh, and one more thing: When Esme and Kitty are reunited, what happens is, shall we say, chilling!

PlayBingo Darling!

I was tremendously honored to be invited to sit at Center for Child Protection Founding CEO Sandra Martin’s table on October 29^th at the 8^th Annual PlayBingo fundraiser at Hilton Austin.  It was also my honor to be seated with such a prestigious group of Very Smart Gals. Pictured left to right: Patti Summerville, Senior Council at Hahn, Texas (formerly Tate Austin).  She is also a well know and well-connected private consultant and facilitator in areas of strategic planning, branding, public relations, etc. Yours Truly is next, then Sandra Martin and Loralee Martin (both of who are profiled below in “My Friends.” Next is Dr. Bettie Meachum, Sandra’s childhood friend. Bettie is a Professor of Psychology and Human Growth And Development at Cedar Valley College, a community college of the Dallas County Community College District, located in Lancaster, in southern Dallas County. Standing behind Bettie is Nancy Hagan, the founding Executive Director of Alliance For Children, the Tarrant County Children’s Advocacy Center program.  She, along with Sandra Martin and Cathy Crabtree, is a founding member of Children’s Advocacy Centers of Texas, Inc., the statewide membership organization of 65 Children’s Advocacy Centers. Next is Cathy Crabtree, who is the Director of State Chapter Development at National Children's Alliance, the national membership and accrediting body for the more than 750 children's advocacy centers and 47 State Chapters throughout the country. Cathy was also the Executive Director of Children's Advocacy Center's of Texas. Next to Cathy is Abby Lentz, the owner and instructor at Heartfelt Yoga.  Abby has appeared on Better, the nationally syndicated lifestyle show from Better Homes and Gardens, and is known for her “Heavyweight Yoga” classes.  And finally, Bobbie Mae Matthews is enjoying her retirement as the long-time Executive Director of The Settlement Club, which owns and operates The SettlementHome for Children, a residential treatment center for girls.  She is now in charge of reservations at Red Corral Ranch in Wimberley, a beautiful B & B and magnificent site for weddings.  Bobbie Mae serves on The Advisory Council of the UT School of Social Work, and is a recipient of The Sheffield Award for Executive Directors from The Austin Community Foundation.