“Yep. That’s him,” says wife. “Whatever!”
Yesterday I had lunch at the Blue Dahlia with three Very Smart Gals, (left to right), Aralyn Hughes, Debra Winegarten, and Mari King, and I'm still buzzing.
#19 - "Always eat when you drink."
If I could write like Mary Karr I’d be thin and rich, my husband would like to travel, my kids would lead charmed lives, my friends would be legion, and the world would be at peace. I grew up poor-ish in Texas like Mary. My mom read a lot and was into intellectualism like Mary’s. So why don’t life-altering phrases swirl out of my head like exotic, scarfed dancers?
What the heck is Gals – Very Smart Gals? I originally created the Very Smart Gals blog because I wanted, or perhaps needed, to record my memories of my recently departed mom, Willie Belle Forbes Wade. Willie was a wile old gal who taught her four daughters and one son many things, not the least of which was to make friends with smart women. Since she was a schoolteacher by trade, she tended to teach her life lessons over and over (the reinforcement principal), so I decided a good way to memorialize my mom and capture her wisdom was to repeat the things she taught me. Voila! “One Hundred Things My Mom Taught Me A Million Times,” the anchor of the Gals – Very Smart Gals blog, was born. Another thing Willie taught us was to read, read, read. Aware of my reading addiction, friends often ask, “What’s good?” So, I began reviewing books on my Gals – Very Smart Gals blog as well, even drawing comments from some of the authors of books reviewed. Then in the fall of 2009, one of the 350+ gals on my list of Very Smart Gals said, “Who are the Very Smart Gals? Why are you keeping all of them to yourself?” So, I began a series of lunches and happy hours to introduce 3-6 women at each get together. The outcome was magical and difficult to define. There were women I had known for 20 years I didn’t know knew each other. There were rediscovered friendships. Gals even discovered shared distant relatives! And each lunch or happy hour ended with very smart gals knowing more very smart gals. The Very Smart Gals live all over the US; they’re every age and every color; they’re wealthy and barely scraping by. In fact, their only common denominator, other than being female, is “smart.”I also tend to be reclusive, so getting the Very Smart Gals together is part of my self-induced therapy, to get me out of my shell. So, what’s the agenda of the Very Smart Gals; what is the deeper meaning? Very Smart Gals is about women appreciating, honoring and supporting each other, and according to wile Willie, that is important enough.
"Very Smart Gals is a very smart blog from SueAnn Wade-Crouse. It covers books, artists, charities and music, along with family reflections from Wade-Crouse's intentional life. Like the best blogs, it blends its author's personality with potentially useful information."
Michael Barnes,Austin American-Statesman Out-And-About, January 31, 2012
If you work hard and excel you will reap rewards, the best of which are memories.
Fun is not a thing. It is a place in your mind.
Relationships go through phases, so just relax.
There is a special place in your heart where you keep your moments of greatness tucked away.
If you want to have friends, you have to be a friend.
You can be different, and that’s OK.
You don’t know how strong you are until you have to be.
Roy Orbison worked for your grandfather.
In 1981 while managing a New Mexico ranch, I discovered the previous manager had been murdered.
When bad things happen, you have two choices. You can get upset, or not. Which feels better?
Put important things in the right and same place every time so you won’t lose and/or damage them.
I snubbed Eagles front man Glenn Fry, and now he’s dead, and I want to apologize.
When things get crazy – when you are confronted by a crisis, be still.
There will be days when you ask yourself, “What’s the point?”
You are never better at doing anything than you are at being yourself.
You always hurt the ones you love.
Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves.
Enjoy your physicality while you can.
When I was about 7-years old I stole 50 cents from my mother and felt so guilty that I confessed.
Sex won’t fix what is wrong with your head or your heart.
Being right feels good for 15 minutes.
Books have significantly written my life.
You can fall in love with a rich man as easily as you can fall in love with a poor man.
Never accept the first table the hostess tries to give you at a restaurant.
Above all else, never be common.
Never say headache, allergies, or nervous.
There’s more than one way to skin a cat.
Always leave an inch of tipping room from the top of your cup or glass.
Men like women with a little meat on their bones.
Always speak to the wife first.
You cannot reason with children.
Get a good job and stay there.
If your hair is too blond, people will think you’re cheap.
Always make sure you have plenty of roughage in your diet.
You should visit lots of different churches because that will help you understand religion.
Sauces are just to disguise poor cuts of meat.
Always rinse your face with cold water. Hot water breaks down the tissue and causes more wrinkles.
Always keep a little towel in the car.
Always wear a good bra so your breast won’t sag.
Don't wear too much makeup. It will make other women distrust you.
Always wear a slip. You don't want anyone seeing through your skirt. That looks cheap.
Always wash the drinking glasses first, when the dishwater is cleanest.
Don’t let children fill up on tea before supper.
Practice your Miss America walk and graceful hands.
You are not Ansel Adams, so always put people in your pictures.
Mercurochrome and Vaseline will cure anything.
Practice moderation in all things.
When you get a run in your hose don't throw them away, you can stop the run with clear nail polish.
Make your husband a pie. He’ll feel loved.
Always clean your kitchen while you cook. It should be clean when you sit down to eat.
Don't wear your glasses, they hide your true beauty and make you look weak.
Always stick up for your sons and daughters-in-law.
Keep your money in your shoe. That way you don’t have to carry a purse.
Put a soft cloth on the arms of your chairs. It will keep them from getting so worn.
Always carry a handkerchief. It helps distinguish you from the riffraff.
Wear white if you want the media to take your picture. They love to photograph people in white.
Turn the lights off when you leave a room. It saves electricity and helps keep the house cooler.
Never pull your skin on your face.
Make sure you have plenty of beds for family.
Never curse or use profanity. It makes you common.
Put coins in a jar for your children.
Don't pick your nose. I will make your nostrils large.
Before a meal, pour the tea last so the ice won't melt and dilute the tea.
Put bells on your door so you can hear when people come and go.
Check all the fluids in the car every time you fill up with gas.
Use petroleum jelly around your eyes.
You can get away with wearing short hair because you have good features.
Always put on lipstick so you won't look so washed out.
Don’t wear glasses, they make your eyes weak.
When blankets get old and thin, patch them together.
A sweet potato makes a beautiful, inexpensive, fast growing houseplant.
Always behave nicely with boys or they will never marry you.
Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, and keep your chin up.
Don't drive with your shoes on; you'll scuff up the heels.
Never throw anything away. You never know when you might need it.
Always wipe around plates to get the food dribbles off before you serve.
Never buy anything until it goes on sale.
Have a good cry. That’s why women live longer than men, because they cry.
Make sure you sit out in the sun to get your vitamin D, but don’t get the sun on your face.
Tear your bread into little pieces before you put gravy on it.
If you don't want to milk a cow, then don't learn how.
Never put your knives in the dishwater. You’ll cut yourself.
Never mash pimples. You'll make scars.
Socialize with people younger than yourself. It will keep you young.
Keep a $50 bill hidden in your billfold just in case of an emergency.
Stay out of hospitals. That’s where all the sick people are.
Save bacon fat. It adds a lot more flavor to food than anything you get at the store.
Always wash your mouth out with cool water to freshen your breath.
Eating beans is a sign that you are poor.
Republicans care about money. Democrats care about people.
Don't let your sons push their sister around. If you do, they'll treat their wives the same way.
Don't ever throw clothes away or give them away or sell them. Give them to your sisters.
I'll leave the front porch light on for you.
All you ever really have is your family.
Don’t tell too much about yourself. It makes you vulnerable.
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